Little Red Riding Hood...

I'm not afraid of the big bad wolf. In fact, currently, right this very second... I'm really not afraid of anything. In fact, I sit here, with a smile on my face. Did someone just tell a joke? Nope, it's leftover from the evening I just had. I can't express how amazing it is when you put it out there and God brings it all together. He stirs in just the right ingredients and before you know it... a perfect bowl of porridge....just right.

Anticipation...

I wonder if the flowers feel like I do right now? I have a feeling they do. They spent all winter cooped up in deep, dark, cold soil...waiting and waiting for their maker to give them enough sun to peak their heads up. Well...they got the call, IN JANUARY and began creeping through the mud and the muck to come to the surface hoping that it really is time to sprout, grow and bloom. They know that if they come out too early that could get hurt, as in it may not REALLY be the time to sprout, a cold frost could come again, or even worse snow and they would wither back into the ground.

My maker has given me plenty of Son, I really, really want to sprout, grow and more than ever BLOOM but I am so very afraid of the frost.

a recipe for contentment...

start with a love for the Lord, a rainbow and desire

add:
1 part piss
2 parts vinegar

a pinch of chuckle
a dash of chorlte

combine with, giggling, playing, smiles and no walls.

Layer everywhere with the Holy Spirit and faithfully wait.

My personal Valentine...from the lover of my soul...

The Lord your God is in the midst of you, a Mighty One, a Savior (Who saves)! He will rejoice over you with joy; He will rest (in silent satisfaction) and in His love He will be silent and make no mention (of past sins, or even recall them); He will exult over you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17 Amplified Bible

This morning I got an e-mail that was a personal devotion... this was the verse that it stemmed from. With everything that the Lord has been telling me these past few days, I feel as though He just sent me the very best Valentine a girl could get. Who else gets a Valentine from the creator and lover of her soul?

God loves me, just as I am, and not only that He rejoices in me...and today, nothing else matters.

What I thought IS...is not what I thought, I thought.

Sometimes I ain't so smart, ya know, but when sincerely looking for answers...you will always get one.

For the longest time, I have had a vision of what I thought my life would look like...and as I've gotten older have grasped and clamored to hold on to that dream and that hope.

Recently a very dear friend of mine, not meaning to, blurted out something that the minute it left her lips, she knew had probably scarred me for life. I am still not sure I'm okay with it but it is what it is and I by no means hold her and her honesty responsible. And it made me think...and it made me begin searching for some answers.

Yesterday while quietly combing the beach, Alice pulling me along in the pouring down rain, I was asking God for a little treat. I've learned that finding a heart shaped rock makes you feel like you've been kissed by God sooo really I was hoping to find the biggest, shiniest, most perfect heart shaped rock, so that I would know, life was going to be okay. But while looking for those rocks, one question kept playing over and over again in my mind... Would you change your mind? If I asked you, would you change your mind? I didn't know if I could (still am not sure if I have)...I kept walking, almost ignoring the question, feeling like it would all be okay if I could just find that stupid heart shaped rock. I came upon this small patch of pebbles, and shells and drift wood. I looked down and in the midst of this pile of pebbles was a heart shaped shell. Wow that's cool, ohhh man, I was excited, this is way better than a dull, gray heart shaped ROCK..it was a beautiful white heart shaped shell. As I continued to meander down the beach, I got more and more excited as it seemed, every step I would find another heart shaped shell. And when I was done combing the beach, I heard the question again... Would you change your mind? I did. I was searching high and low for what I thought was the most coveted on the beach, a heart shaped rock....but what I was given was so much better. How long has the Lord been trying to tell me that what I have longed for, what I have hoped for, what I have hung on to...is merely a heart shaped rock in my my life....when what he wants to give me, what he wants to show me is the shell. I emptied my pockets when I got home and I actually got 9 heart shaped shells yesterday...maybe 10.

Valentine's Day is easy...

It's simple really... all I really need or want in a Valentine is someone that will laugh with me and knows how to love me. Whew... I bet if men knew that they wouldn't be so content being single. Women, or I should say I am not as high maintenance as one would think.

I love to laugh, and not just a quick little snicker but really a gut rolling giggle... a chortle, guffaw, HOWL. And this obviously is better done WITH someone! But it can be created in so many ways. It can be in the middle of a very serious conversation, snuggled up on the couch, when you choose to laugh at the seriousness of life. It can be at funny childhood face-making, like just spontaneously sticking out your tongue. It is done deepest to the core with those that you have built friendship and repoire with because the stories that are laughable go straight to your deepest places. It can be done on a bike, on a beach, in a car. In a plane, on a walk or in the store....

and as I type that I begin to smile, just thinking of all the past guffaws.... I really am easy, because as I remember all the past chortles my heart begins to warm and I realize all the love that is wrapped up in laughter.

Make me laugh, make me guffaw, make me chortle from the depths of my sole and you have begun to know how to truly love me.

Blackened Rainbow with a side of clouds...

Life is hard. Life is lonely at times. Okay for me, life seems lonely a lot. But yesterday, I was driving across the 520 bridge... clouds and wind behind me as I was driving into what looked like the blackest could I have ever seen. There was not an ounce of sunshine in sight... but yet, I looked off to the right and saw a rainbow. A RAINBOW!! How is that possible? (and I don't want a scientific answer to that, it's rhetorical) I KNOW how it's possible for me, God saying, in the midst of what seems like complete darkness, I am here. Hope is there, even when you don't WANT to acknowledge it. He placed a rainbow in the most unexcpected place, in hopes that I would maybe, just maybe, finally get it that HE is my hope.