Being Wanted

I struggle with depression.  That's really no secret.  I tend to lean towards it being situational depression with some whacked out hormones thrown in there for good measure but whatever... sometimes things get pretty dark in my world.  If you've read much lately on here you'll see what I mean.  Anyway, when I get in these valleys I don't really want to do much of anything.  In fact, going to work is about all I can muster up and that's because my responsibility gene is stronger than the depression one.  And I REALLY don't want to spend time with people other than my family and reeeeally close friends.  You know, the people that will love me no matter what.  And so typically that means that I spend a lot of time  alone during these bouts.  Mainly because I am an initiator.  I am the phone caller, the plan maker, the get things going and done girl.  So when I"m down and out... well I have no social life.
A few weeks ago, a friend of mine invited me to dinner.  We had been talking about getting together for a while but it had proven to be a bit of a challenge, we no longer attend the same church and we don't really live near each other.  I accepted the invitation and it felt good.  As I was driving over there I began to cry, thinking of just how good it felt for someone to want to spend time with JUST me.  It wasn't a party that I was invited to or a gathering of a group of friends (because I attend a lot of things like that)  It was someone saying " I want YOU to come to dinner"  I had a marvelous time with her and her husband and kids, being a guest, being loved, being wanted.